Thursday, July 18, 2013

Man in the mirror

Who? Who exactly is that man staring back at me?
Is he a part of my past or who I am destined to be?
I ask him again and again, Are we one and the same?
For everything wrong, which one of us is to blame?
Does he see me as well? Does he know the pain?
Has he been through it too, over and over again?
Just reflection it is, or is inimical rather?  
Which one is me? And which one is the other?

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Conversation between life and death

Life asked death, "Death, why do people like me, but hate you?" Death responded, "Because you, life, are a beautiful lie. And I am a harsh reality"

Friday, March 9, 2012

Thank you Rahul Dravid

Today, Rahul Dravid retired from international cricket. It is hard not to feel a bit emotional for the man who showed very little emotion on and of the cricket field. It is the end of what has been a glorious and illustrious career,spanning more than 15 years, ending with him being the second highest scorer in test cricket. Here are some stats: In 286 Test innings, Dravid played 31,258 balls. Given that no other batsman has faced more than 29,000 deliveries, it puts into perspective the amount of hard work and sheer effort that went into scoring those 13,288 runs.

Hard work, effort, determination, discipline, concentration, humility, dignity. These are the words which come to mind when you speak about Rahul Dravid. He was the perfect man to be out there along with the aggressive stroke makers in the Indian batting line up. Calm and assured, he waited for the bowlers to make a mistake to score his runs. Leaving the ball alone and a compact defensive push were as important strokes to Dravid as the typical flick off his pads or the elegant square drive. As a 11 year old cricket fanatic, I vaguely remember his innings coming in to bat at no.7 on his debut at Lord's. And he never looked back after that, at least in test cricket. He might have his critics in one-day cricket, but nothing can be said about him in test cricket. He was out on 95 on his debut. He would have liked a century on debut, for he has this sense of history about him. He would have wanted to be on that honours board. 15 years later he inscribed his name there with a Dravid special. In an era when Indian opening batsmen were nothing more than sacrificial lambs, he often walked in to bat early in the innings. He was instrumental in turning India's overseas records from abysmal to respectable. It was not just by the sheer number of runs he scored overseas, but the sense of calm and belief he brought to the dressing room when he was out in the middle. He was a man who could be counted stand up at the toughest times, and he delivered more often than not.

People from my generation should realize how lucky we have been to grow up watching distinguished gentlemen of outstanding integrity playing together - Dravid, Tendulkar, Ganguly, Laxman, Srinath, Kumble. Hence, it hurts to see youngsters like Raina and Kohli swearing and showing middle finger. They need to learn from Dravid that you let the bat do the talking, for Dravid was a man of few words. Respect mattered to him, it is a word he will often use in conversation ("the respect in your dressing room and that of your opponents is what matters") and he strived to achieve it, at times maybe too hard. For me, Dravid has never got the recognition he deserved. I would say he was a bit unfortunate to be playing in the same era as Sachin Tendulkar, the world's best batsman after Sir Don Bradman. Dravid has often been the supporting act during great innings by Sachin, Laxman, Sehwag, Ganguly et al. His great innings have often been overshadowed by those who came in later when things were easier, or should I say, made easier by Dravid. But then, Dravid did not seem to mind that. He was never comfortable with the glaring media attention. He liked to stay in the back, away from all the attention; doing what he does the best - scoring runs. This can also be seen the way he announced his retirement - in a sudden press conference, not before a game like Ganguly or Kumble. No carrying around the stadium over the shoulders, no guard of honour, no last standing ovation. That is just not Dravid.

When anyone will sit down to make a list of All Time Greatest India XI, the no.3 spot will be reserved for him. Such has been his influence and contribution in Tests, it might be very easy to overlook his contribution in ODIs. Early in his career, he was criticized to be unfit for the shorter format. But he went back to the nets, developed his game, learnt to play with soft hands, and came back a much much improved player. He has always been selfless, and it showed in his willingness to keep wickets in 2003, just for the sake of balance of the team. It was not something he enjoyed. He did not look comfortable doing it. But he was willing to make himself look ugly, just so that the team would look good. He was also willing to bat anywhere in the order for the team. Whenever there was talk of a youngster coming in and a senior dropped from the one-day squad, it was always, unfairly, Dravid. He might not have been the quickest runner or the fastest scorer, but still he was invaluable.

Thank you Rahul Dravid for your contribution to Indian cricket. You shall be sorely missed. Never again will I get that assured feeling when a no.3 walks in to bat for India at 12/1 on a seaming Lord's wicket, or a pacy Durban wicket, or a hard bouncy Adelaide wicket, or a Mumbai dust bowl. Never again will I enjoy a batsman defending or leaving a ball as much as I did watching you. In this IPL age, never again will I see a batsman grind out a century, batting for more than 8 hours against genuine fast bowling in tough conditions to save a game for India. Never again will I see a man doing whatever it needs for the sake of the team - be it opening the batting in tests, or playing down the order to guide youngsters, or keeping wickets for the sake of team balance. Never again will I see a more dignified gentleman and a true role model-with his behavior on and off the field. Never again will the sight of the Indian slip cordon be the same. Never again will I see the sweat dripping down the helmet as a testimony of the hard work and disciplined effort put in. Never again will there be another WALL.

Thursday, February 2, 2012


His phone rang. It was her.

"Hellooo!!!What's my shonaaa doing!!!???", she asked in her usual bubbly tone.
He hated that word 'shonaa'. So cheesy. It was a word for "blind in love teenagers who have not even seen the real word" according to him.
"You know what, today I went out shopping. I got this beautiful dress for so cheap."
"And then, on the way back, I had a pastry at this local bakery. It was soo yummy. But now I am not hungry. And so I called you!!", she continued in her excited tone.
"Hmm..." This was his standard reply during any phone conversation, like most guys
"What hmm. What are you doing? Why are you giving me monosyllabic answers?"
"I am very sleepy. Can I call you tomorrow? I am going to sleep"
"What the heck? I have not talked to you whole day today. Both were busy at work all day. We have not even met for the last 4 days. And you want to sleep! OK, fine. Bye.". She hung up.

He could sense from her tone she was pissed.

Silly her! She does not even know that sleep is just an excuse......

.....To meet her. In his dreams.

Monday, January 16, 2012


He sat at his work desk. He was typing away furiously. Of course, he should be. He had a clear logic in his head, and wanted to finish coding before it all fades away. That is what programmers do. They think and ponder over things for long, and then in an eureka moment, it all strikes them. It could be in the middle of the night. He had experienced those days in graduate school when he struggled with his assignments all day long. Finally, he used to retreat to his bed, tired and frustrated. And then in the middle of the night, it used to strike him. He used to get up and start coding, and the assignment would be done within an hour.

The thought of the graduate school days put a smile on his face. Those were some of the best days of the life. Some great friends were made. Life taught him the survival methods. He learnt it the hard way. He had graduated, and got a job in a leading global software development giant.
He stopped for a second, and pondered over something. Is this what he wants to do in life? Maybe. But that "maybe" might be his answer because of the decisions he had made. Coming to the US, getting his masters degree, living a good standard of living et all. But was it what he REALLY wanted to do in life? Was his head and mind in this at this moment?Would he like a vacation right now, and visit family and friends back home in India? "Yes. But I cannot because of visa issues." YES BUT. Never were more fatal words uttered. "Yeah, but what about my education loan?" "Yes, but what about the job" "Yeah but ......." "Yeah. But........"

“Yeah, but…” is pernicious. Because it makes it sound like we have the best of intentions when really we are just too scared to do what we should.It allows us to be cowards, while sounding noble. The yea-but kills your dreams. It makes you live in constant fear and doubt. Of yourself. People say that childhood is the best time of the life. Why? Because you do not have the yeah-buts and what-ifs in your mind before you do anything. The older you grow, the more they crop up. These will always exist. You are after all a mature,responsible adult and cannot live in denial of the truth. But there are times when you need to become a child again and not think of the yeah-buts.

His thoughts were interrupted when his manager stopped by at his desk.Manager: "So, what's up?" He smiled, shook his head and got back to typing away.