Nature

What started as a beautiful fall day......

.....gave way to a windy afternoon.....

.....which turned into a gloomy, overcast evening.....

......before ending as a cold, stormy night.

Ah, the unpredictable wonders of nature!!

Murderer

Walking through the dark
Carrying your mate, the gun
That voice in your head
It has only just begun

Confused, you do your rounds
Tears in the eyes blur your vision
The mute gunshot sounds
You have to carry out your mission

BANG!
Closing your eyes to the sight
You could hear his scream
His body hits the ground
You wish it was just a dream

You wish you could just end it all
But the anonymous voice stops you cold
You slowly return to the dark hall
Doing exactly what you're told

The Ultimate Experience

I always wanted to write this, but stuttered each time I thought about it. For this is something which is not to be written, read or imagined. This is something which is to be experienced. This is the ultimate experience. This is the first experience in the North Stand at Wankhede Stadium, Mumbai with Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar walking out to bat. If you have not experienced this, you have not lived your life.

It was a mild, foggy February morning in Mumbai, not too different from others. Mumbaikars were in the usual haste that morning. Local trains to Churchgate were packed as always. But today, they were a little more crowded than everyday. There were 30 odd thousand people in a hurry to reach Churchgate station and take the 3 minute walk to Wankhede stadium. India were playing South Africa in the first test of the series.

The decision to forego a day of academic enlightenment to watch a test match was an easy one to make. Finding company was not too difficult either, The trip from the northern reaches of the city to the stadium for our group of three cricket fanatics was a long one and the match was underway as we reached. Scrambling to locate the right gate for entry, we had overheard someone say India were batting. Oh my God!! Those were the days when Indian opening batsmen were more of sacrificial lambs than an actual spot in the team. Those were still the days when the Indian batting was prone to abject collapses against pace bowling and the first day of a series against an attack comprising Allan Donald, Shaun Pollock, Jacques Kallis and Lance Klusener was a disaster waiting to happen from an Indian spectator’s perspective. Thankfully, India had lost only one wicket when we reached. The stadium was full and noisy, with the notorious North Stand making the most noise as always. Just as we were settling in our seats, Allan 'White Lightning' Donald snuck one through the defences of Rahul 'The Wall' Dravid and clattered the off stump.

From the time the off stump was disturbed as Dravid started walking back to the pavilion, you could heard a pin drop in the stadium. The stage was all set. And then it began. As Dravid was halfway to the pavilion, there was a smattering of applause.  It sounded a low rumble, like a bunch of super-bees had descended on the stadium. Then a definite rhythm was audible in the rumble. The chant grew louder as Dravid reached the boundary. The volume rising at an exponential rate. The whole stadium was in a frenzy. And then it happened. Mumbai’s favourite son emerged from the pavilion. The short frame, the MRF blade, the blue helmet, the trademark look at the heavens while walking out. The stadium erupted. This was what they were here for.

As the thousands of pairs of eyes followed him to the crease, each pair of lungs seemed to want to outdo the next. As if to eradicate any doubt about the cynosure of mass hysteria, the chant went…"Saaaacaaccchiiinnnnnn......Sachin!!!". Everyone seemed to be in a state of trance. Forgetting everyone and everything else in their life, each and every person in the stadium was chanting his name. It was a decibel level I had never experienced before. It was like the people of the city were making their claim known, this is Mumbai and this is Sachin Tendulkar! As Sachin took guard and Donald started his run, it went quiet again. I can’t prove it, but am fairly sure all the breaths were held. The delivery pitched on a good length and was met on the back foot, with a straight bat. The reassuring thud of bat on ball went around the stadium, and everyone breathed again.

Sachin scored 97 that day, an innings full of drives, cuts and pulls. He was the lone warrior battling, like most times, in an otherwise miserable Indian batting performance. The fact that he missed his century was an anti-climax, but it did not matter. Even if he had got out that first ball from Donald, it wouldn't have mattered. He would have got as grand an ovation as he got when he came in, no matter what. India went on to lose the match over the next couple of days. But on the way back home that evening, I experienced a joy like never before. Like I said before, something you cannot describe, but can only experience. And that's what Sachin has been doing since 1989- bringing joy to the lives of every ordinary Indian.

Common DD

No DD is not Door Darshan. Or Designated (Drunk) Driver. Although the post is related to being drunk. I am talking about Common Drunk Dialogues.

I have noticed that people (including myself) talk much more when they get a little buzzed. They tend to repeat the same thing over and over again, up to a point when you(if you are sober/less drunk) feel like punching him in the face. Here are a few common lines after people get drunk.

- I miss you.(sounds good if a girl says it to you)
- Tu to mera bhai hai...bhai !!!(doesn't sound good if a girl says it, heartbreak :P) / Tu hi mera saccha dost hai.
- You know i am not drunk.(yea right,5 glasses of whiskey and 3 shots of tequila does not affect your nervous system one bit)
- I will drive. (DUI in waiting)
- Aaj saali chad nahi rahi hai kya baat hai?? (Maybe because you are spilling more than you are drinking)
- Main aaj tak talli nahi hua hu. ( Or maybe, you don't remember puking all over the lawn and passing out in the bathroom two weeks back!)
- What do you think?I am drunk? (No, I KNOW you are drunk)
- Sach baat bol raha hu, sach baat bol raha hu. Tu bura mat maan. (OK,I won't take any offense about any shit you say)
- Main teri dil se izzat karta hu... (Bill se bhi kar de)
- Yaar magar tune mera dil tod diya.Tu woh din aaya hi nahi (Dude, WOH DIN happened 2 years back, get over it now)
- Kya tu aaj kal hamare saath pita hi nahi. ( What am I doing now?)
- Bahut din baad yaar ke saath pee raha hu. ( Didn't we drink just yesterday?!!)
- Tu bolna bhai, kya chahiye?Jaan haazir hai. ( I would prefer if you stop drinking, but then you want to drink more so that you can die sooner and haazir your jaan to me)
- Chal aur ek ek maarte hai. (You sure?)
- Yaar aaj uski bahut yaad aa rahi hai. ( Was she your bartender or something?)
- Abe bol daal aaj usko, aar yaa paar. Nahi to main bolta hu, la phone de. (Kisko?)
- Usko saale ko $%@#&**^% la idhar, dho daalunga ( I think you need to wash your face first)
- Dude.........apun na...........woh na..........leave it. (?????)
- Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (What's so funny? : )

And Finally........

- Saala...aaj se daru band...............!!! (and the guy passes out)

These are just some of the common lines. People come up with gems when they are inebriated. However, I would refrain from putting them here, since such gems are meant to be hidden away from the view of the world. So until next time, CHEERS!!

Leave a comment about more such lines you say when you get drunk :P , or your friends for that matter.
Try to leave the comment when you are drunk, so that you don't have to think about what to comment, it will come naturally :D

Just Like That

Alpha Mike Oscar Golf Hotel

Thats my name spelled according to ICAO spelling alphabet :P