Thursday, September 9, 2010

The Ultimate Experience


I always wanted to write this, but stuttered each time I thought about it. For this is something which is not to be written, read or imagined. This is something which is to be experienced. This is the ultimate experience. This is the first experience in the North Stand at Wankhede Stadium, Mumbai with Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar walking out to bat. If you have not experienced this, you have not lived your life.

It was a mild, foggy February morning in Mumbai, not too different from others. Mumbaikars were in the usual haste that morning. Local trains to Churchgate were packed as always. But today, they were a little more crowded than everyday. There were 30 odd thousand people in a hurry to reach Churchgate station and take the 3 minute walk to Wankhede stadium. India were playing South Africa in the first test of the series.

The decision to forego a day of academic enlightenment to watch a test match was an easy one to make. Finding company was not too difficult either, The trip from the northern reaches of the city to the stadium for our group of three cricket fanatics was a long one and the match was underway as we reached. Scrambling to locate the right gate for entry, we had overheard someone say India were batting. Oh my God!! Those were the days when Indian opening batsmen were more of sacrificial lambs than an actual spot in the team. Those were still the days when the Indian batting was prone to abject collapses against pace bowling and the first day of a series against an attack comprising Allan Donald, Shaun Pollock, Jacques Kallis and Lance Klusener was a disaster waiting to happen from an Indian spectator’s perspective. Thankfully, India had lost only one wicket when we reached. The stadium was full and noisy, with the notorious North Stand making the most noise as always. Just as we were settling in our seats, Allan 'White Lightning' Donald snuck one through the defences of Rahul 'The Wall' Dravid and clattered the off stump.

From the time the off stump was disturbed as Dravid started walking back to the pavilion, you could heard a pin drop in the stadium. The stage was all set. And then it began. As Dravid was halfway to the pavilion, there was a smattering of applause.  It sounded a low rumble, like a bunch of super-bees had descended on the stadium. Then a definite rhythm was audible in the rumble. The chant grew louder as Dravid reached the boundary. The volume rising at an exponential rate. The whole stadium was in a frenzy. And then it happened. Mumbai’s favourite son emerged from the pavilion. The short frame, the MRF blade, the blue helmet, the trademark look at the heavens while walking out. The stadium erupted. This was what they were here for.

As the thousands of pairs of eyes followed him to the crease, each pair of lungs seemed to want to outdo the next. As if to eradicate any doubt about the cynosure of mass hysteria, the chant went…"Saaaacaaccchiiinnnnnn......Sachin!!!". Everyone seemed to be in a state of trance. Forgetting everyone and everything else in their life, each and every person in the stadium was chanting his name. It was a decibel level I had never experienced before. It was like the people of the city were making their claim known, this is Mumbai and this is Sachin Tendulkar! As Sachin took guard and Donald started his run, it went quiet again. I can’t prove it, but am fairly sure all the breaths were held. The delivery pitched on a good length and was met on the back foot, with a straight bat. The reassuring thud of bat on ball went around the stadium, and everyone breathed again.

Sachin scored 97 that day, an innings full of drives, cuts and pulls. He was the lone warrior battling, like most times, in an otherwise miserable Indian batting performance. The fact that he missed his century was an anti-climax, but it did not matter. Even if he had got out that first ball from Donald, it wouldn't have mattered. He would have got as grand an ovation as he got when he came in, no matter what. India went on to lose the match over the next couple of days. But on the way back home that evening, I experienced a joy like never before. Like I said before, something you cannot describe, but can only experience. And that's what Sachin has been doing since 1989- bringing joy to the lives of every ordinary Indian.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Common DD

No DD is not Door Darshan. Or Designated (Drunk) Driver. Although the post is related to being drunk. I am talking about Common Drunk Dialogues.

I have noticed that people (including myself) talk much more when they get a little buzzed. They tend to repeat the same thing over and over again, up to a point when you(if you are sober/less drunk) feel like punching him in the face. Here are a few common lines after people get drunk.

- I miss you.(sounds good if a girl says it to you)
- Tu to mera bhai hai...bhai !!!(doesn't sound good if a girl says it, heartbreak :P) / Tu hi mera saccha dost hai.
- You know i am not drunk.(yea right,5 glasses of whiskey and 3 shots of tequila does not affect your nervous system one bit)
- I will drive. (DUI in waiting)
- Aaj saali chad nahi rahi hai kya baat hai?? (Maybe because you are spilling more than you are drinking)
- Main aaj tak talli nahi hua hu. ( Or maybe, you don't remember puking all over the lawn and passing out in the bathroom two weeks back!)
- What do you think?I am drunk? (No, I KNOW you are drunk)
- Sach baat bol raha hu, sach baat bol raha hu. Tu bura mat maan. (OK,I won't take any offense about any shit you say)
- Main teri dil se izzat karta hu... (Bill se bhi kar de)
- Yaar magar tune mera dil tod diya.Tu woh din aaya hi nahi (Dude, WOH DIN happened 2 years back, get over it now)
- Kya tu aaj kal hamare saath pita hi nahi. ( What am I doing now?)
- Bahut din baad yaar ke saath pee raha hu. ( Didn't we drink just yesterday?!!)
- Tu bolna bhai, kya chahiye?Jaan haazir hai. ( I would prefer if you stop drinking, but then you want to drink more so that you can die sooner and haazir your jaan to me)
- Chal aur ek ek maarte hai. (You sure?)
- Yaar aaj uski bahut yaad aa rahi hai. ( Was she your bartender or something?)
- Abe bol daal aaj usko, aar yaa paar. Nahi to main bolta hu, la phone de. (Kisko?)
- Usko saale ko $%@#&**^% la idhar, dho daalunga ( I think you need to wash your face first)
- Dude.........apun na...........woh na..........leave it. (?????)
- Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (What's so funny? : )

And Finally........

- Saala...aaj se daru band...............!!! (and the guy passes out)

These are just some of the common lines. People come up with gems when they are inebriated. However, I would refrain from putting them here, since such gems are meant to be hidden away from the view of the world. So until next time, CHEERS!!

Leave a comment about more such lines you say when you get drunk :P , or your friends for that matter.
Try to leave the comment when you are drunk, so that you don't have to think about what to comment, it will come naturally :D

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Just Like That

Alpha Mike Oscar Golf Hotel

Thats my name spelled according to ICAO spelling alphabet :P

Thursday, July 22, 2010

5th July

I know it is a little late to post this, but better late than never.

I was having lunch in a restaurant with a few friends on 5th July.4th July being Sunday, Monday was a holiday. For the un-Americanized, 4th July is America's 15th August(independence Day). And if it falls on a Sunday, Monday is declared a holiday. They do not have holidays here in the US like we do back home. Of course, with 4 major religions(33 million gods in one of them) and countless festivals for each of the religions, all the warriors and leaders, we just need an occasion for a holiday. And I am not even counting the holidays one gets because of the rains, bandhs or political tension. So with only a handful of public holidays, Americans make sure that they get a long extended weekends on all on them. This gives them a chance to sit in front of television one whole more day and drink beer, or drive to some place and drink more beer there.

Anyways back to the restaurant.So, I was having dinner and there was a group of American guys, all in their late teens, sitting on the table next to us. There was nothing out of the ordinary until the following exchange:
Dude 1: Is July 5th, like, a federal holiday each year?
Dude 2: Ummm. I don't fuckin know. I know 4th July is.
Dude 1: Then, why do we have off?
Dude 3: I think it is a holiday each year man. Maybe it's because, like, it was the first full day they really got to celebrate the Declaration of Independence you know.

And he wasn't even joking. I nearly choked on my lunch.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Time Machine

Time machines exist in life.The one which takes you in the past is called memories.The one which takes you to the future is called dreams.